19 Nov 2021

 Damn... i have a puritan existence perfect memory... especially for those whom i find plucky and interesting |OR the unknowable quietest ones... that i know must be shown too. Because only one image haunts. The one who thought no one would see her or want to. The one who thought her countenance would never interest anyone and had that countenance of no one. The most beautiful countenance of all. And hers alone sustained. I wish her only well. And wish often ...

But i have a few balls in the air - the rest to throw away if anyone else wishes to catch them. This one i bounce forever - that rest of life. 

But i have forgotten with too many balls a whizzin around what i have said. And certainly will not be reviewing my own waffle for anything other than the many typos likely innit thus far.

And it has now 'gone'..buggerations.... .what i needed to footnote, herenote...  because there is a sequence...definitely a sequence. I do know my sequence - cannot not know it it's drilled in...  to the daily drill. For years.

What i know - from years ago, when once i was in fact commented upon - person to person by London liyterati... woman and mum.... poetry you can do it...slam it in... i 'get' it...your weave..

I can weave anything but had thought maybe that had gone. But no it hasn't. I hate the silly word 'stress'... these words define what we know not are ... so silly. And more and more by the day. here is only one word for being so buggerated and drained from a  bit too much you cannot think, know the weave is still there. And said lady of letters back then. Her comments did me no good - years of early Quinning about after that i pondered, the worst thing indeed for the creative weave is to have some accolade from someone worth having an accolade from. Does death itself. Only knowing yourself that despite being ignored are you coming up with new thought, some good.... that is the sublime. As that man said...yes it does. Yesterday i 'got' it. At one sentence.... 

On does not ever wish to or need to offend or fuck off anyone, but one certainly never needs even an acknowledgement of the opposite either. There lies one thing only: the best authentic energy to do what next, there is.   If it must be Quinntime he will be running away with a very big smile on his face.